


theirs not to reason why,  theirs but to do and die

by yaminogemu



Category: Naruto
Genre: Character Study, Child Neglect, Gen, Hinata and Naruto are friends, Namikaze Minato's A+ Parenting, no beta we die like men, slightly OOC hinata but only because of the previous tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 23:07:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23375149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yaminogemu/pseuds/yaminogemu
Summary: "The Yondaime Hokage is my father." Naruto repeated, looking out toward the gently rolling water. "The Yondiame Hokage was my father."Hinata has no idea what to say."He sealed the fox inside me."Hinatareallyhas no idea what to say.
Relationships: Hyuuga Hinata & Uzumaki Naruto, Hyuuga Hinata/Uzumaki Naruto, Namikaze Minato & Uzumaki Naruto
Comments: 4
Kudos: 89





	theirs not to reason why,  theirs but to do and die

**Author's Note:**

> au in which hinata and naruto are better friends when they're genin? hinata seems to know naruto so well that it's strange to me that they're not at least friends pre-shippuden.

"I talked to my father."

Hinata's gasp can be heard clearly over the gentle trickle of the creek at their feet, heard over the crickets chirping in the nearby grass. Even without trying, Naruto is aware the chakra around him, from the ant colony burrowed underground a few feet to his left to the girl, the only person he can bring himself to tell this, sitting beside him in shock. He can feel them, now, feel the life that surrounds Konoha even after...

Even after.

A few moments pass in silence until Hinata caves. 

"Your father?" She prompts hesitantly.

"The Yondaime Hokage."

"The what?!" She squeaks. Naruto looks over at her in alarm - he hadn't known her voice could reach that high of a pitch. She immediately slaps both hands over her mouth and winces. 

"Sorry," she mumbles, "I'm just... surprised."

He smiles at her slightly in an attempt to reassure her. It seems to do the trick. Her hands fall back in her lap and she turns to face him more directly.

The two shinobi sit on a dock on the outskirts of their village. Each spent their respective day helping the rebuilding effort. Exhausted, and in Hinata's case with a desperate need to escape well-meaning and curious civilians who witnessed her mid-invasion love confession, the two escaped prying eyes to eat dinner together in peace. Noodle cup dinner, that is. Naruto had been the one to invite her, and Hinata couldn't have been more relieved that she hadn't ruined their friendship with her suddenly proclaimed feelings.

Not that they were very well hidden in the first place, but, well, Naruto has a very one track mind. He tends to ignore anything that wasn't his current focus.

"The Yondaime Hokage is my father." Naruto repeats, looking out toward the gently rolling water. "The Yondiame Hokage was my father."

Hinata has no idea what to say.

"He sealed the fox inside me."

Hinata _really_ has no idea what to say.

She's saved from her internal flailing when Naruto continues to speak, despite her silence, even picking up steam.

"I understand why he did it."

He laughs without cheer. "It makes sense. He had a choice, and he chose to trust me with a weapon instead of destroying it. He said it was to protect me. It was his way of showing he cared about me."

He's still smiling, and it's wrong, all wrong. Hinata's stomach twists and she reaches out a hand instinctively. It finds Naruto's own, resting on the dock between them. 

"Naruto..." she murmurs.

"I understand," his brow furrows, "but I dont understand. I looked him in the eye and asked, but I still don't understand. How could you do that to your own child?"

His voice breaks on the last word. He shakes his head, frustrated, and she only tightens her grip on his hand. She has no idea how to fix this.

"He knew what would happen to me." He's quiet, now, and Hinata has to tilt forward to hear him. "He knew how much his actions would fuck up my life."

"I want to love him." Hinata's heart squeezes painfully in her chest. One of her most important people sits beside her, tears shining in his eyes. "I've spent my entire life looking at the people around me, the people who are loved, and wished every moment that I could have someone like that as my own. That I could have a father that cared for me like their fathers care. Someone who I could trust. Someone who would love me."

Naruto swallows then gasps, shutting his eyes tightly. He releases his grip against the wooden dock and Hinata seizes the opportunity to take his hand in her own. He doesn't respond, but his breathing does seem to slow.

"And the thing is," Naruto opens his eyes and turns to look at her for the first time since he started to speak. Tears begin to roll down his cheeks. Hinata sits frozen.

"The thing is, I think he does love me." His eyes dart to the side, thinking.

"He thinks he loves me," he corrects himself, faces her once more, "but I hear him say the words, I hear him speak of me as if he knows a damn thing about me, and I doubt." 

"If you love someone, why would you intentionally put them through pain?"

Hinata vehemently suppresses her own reaction to his words. She remains unchanged, but can't help but close her eyes for a moment. Why... why _would_ anyone do that? A question she's asked herself many times.

"I'm not a father, so maybe these thoughts are just as stupid as any other thoughts of mine." Naruto rubs the back of his neck with his free hand, self-conscious and quieter than her Naruto should ever have to be. The hand linked with hers remains unmoved.

She shushes him gently. "You are not stupid, Naruto."

His expression flashes in surprise, for a moment, and Hinata has the sudden need to go track down a certain pink haired teammate of his and give her a good thwack on the head. See how she likes it, when the tables turn, huh?

He sends her a sheepish smile, more genuine this time at least. She waits patiently while Naruto gathers his thoughts. 

"I'd like to think that if I had a child," he begins slowly, "I wouldn't just leave a legacy. I'd live for him, be there for him. Spend every day with him, not shove my own burdens onto him and leave."

"I want to be proud, I think, to be his son. I want to love him."

"T-That's amazing, Naruto," she can feel her cheeks flushing red (God, she hasn't stuttered in front of him in years, her nerves must really be completely shot by now), "but you don't owe him your love, if you can't bring yourself to give it."

He leans closer, a few more inches and his head would be resting against her shoulder. She stays still, despite her anxiety, and offers him what comfort she can give. 

"I do love him, I think," he whispers, "but I'm still so... so angry."

She might have been near death at the time, but she can still vividly remember the oppressive force of the Kyuubi's chakra. All that anger, all that pain, wrapped up in one devastating aura of suffering. The Kyuubi is the embodiment of terror, of vengeance. 

But Naruto is not.

"It feels like... if I let go of that anger... I'm betraying my younger self. I'm betraying what he suffered, I'm forgetting what happened." He lets out a frustrated huff, closer to a growl. "If I forget what happened, how I lived, then that means everyone gets away with it."

Gets away with it.

And isn't that just what happened?

How everyone treated Naruto.... how the _Hokage_ treated Naruto....

If not for the miraculous sense of devotion to Konoha that Naruto has come to embody, he very likely could have turned against the village that mistreated him so. Anyone else would have.

Although, Hinata herself is quite accustomed to Naruto being her own personal miracle.

"That... terrifies me. I couldn't do anything about what I went though but remember it, and if I forgive... I'm so scared I'll forget."

She grabs Naruto's other hand from where it hangs listlessly in his lap and squeezes both hands tightly. Naruto is such an expressive person, seeing him this still and dejected... sparks something in Hinata.

"You will not forget." She says firmly. "Neither will I. We will remember, and we will fix it. We will use your memory to prevent what happened to you from happening to anyone else."

Naruto stares down at their hands.

"You will become Hokage." His gaze snaps back up to hers. "I will help you in any way I can. I will stand by your side against anyone, council be damned."

Naruto laughs in disbelief. Whether at the sudden uncharacteristic swear or at her message itself, she can't decide.

"You have so many people around you now who care, who love you. We know what happened to you was wrong. We will stand by you... we're bringing about shinobi peace and understanding, right?"

Naruto nods, eyes locked on Hinata's.

"Sounds easy enough, Naruto," she smiles, her own tears beginning to fall, "because it's you."

She doesn't know how else to say it, how to help him understand the sheer feeling she always finds herself tangled in, but luckily for her... he gets it. He falls foward against her. His head rests at her shoulder. He yanks his hands from her own only to draw her into a hug.

Her arms wrap around him in return as she lets the boy she loves lean on her, for a change.

**Author's Note:**

> is minato objectively a bad father? no. this is just cathartic for me, personally. i'm in the middle of pain's invasion and i honestly wasn't expecting the show to let naruto get angry at his father like that. i think the act of forgiving parents, or adults who failed you, is incredibly difficult and a different journey for everyone.
> 
> hinata is here and also possibly ooc because hey. listen. its 2020 and i still haven't finished naruto. but i loved her fight with pain. the kind of love where you'd give anything to ensure the other person is safe and happy, where they make you a better version of yourself, where you genuinely believe in and support their dreams? it's a very selfless and wonderful thing, to love someone that much. and also a nice change of pace from the other assorted love side-plots that are mostly weirdly invasive and shallow. idk i think that hinata and naruto are cute together. i might write another fic where they don't get together tho, bc hinata learning to be friends with naruto and loving him in that way is also interesting to me. anyway... this is whatever. i made them friends in this bc all my fics are me vibing with the characters i write.


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